The ramblings of a woman,
wife, & mother, who loves:
Jesus / my man / the three,
learning about parenting /
mamahood / childbirth,
cooking foods healthy /
international / yummy,
pretending to garden /
write / design,
attempting to run /
exercise / lift weights,
enjoying traveling /
camping / adventures,
finding ways to love /
serve / sacrifice for others.

It is not to say she does these things
with style or grace, or even skill.

The Lost Seinfeld Episode - The MIssing Band Aid.

April 9, 2008 - 7:21 AM

I suppose one of things one loves about Seinfeld is that, in reality, the situation is innocent and charming enough but as in all Seinfeld, the ending is a bust. Truthfully, this situation was really wonderful the whole time through, learning to cook Mediterranean food, delicious ingredients, with a good friend & yummy wine, I had a wonderful night last night... but this one little thing that honestly kept me up last night, made the cynic in me decided to turn it into a Seinfeld episode...

Jerry somehow meets this woman who is a cooking instructor and is attracted to her. He signs up for her cooking class, gets Kramer to come with, attends the class and sits in the front row. The whole time you are listening to her give instructions with intermittent overlays of thoughts going on in Jerry's head. Jerry is not paying any attention to Kramer who is soaking up every second of it more than Jerry. Jerry is contemplating if the woman is truly worth it,, yada, yada, yada.

Halfway through the class, the instructor takes off a band aid from her finger and leaves it on the work surface, out of the way, but on the work surface. Jerry's seat and the big overhead mirror to better show the demonstration are directly in line to watch this band aid, just sit there on the surface. He frantically looks around, trying to see if anyone will notice, but everyone has eyes glued on the instructor.

Of course this would be played in and out of the other saga for the night... George pretending he is a visiting Super while he was found downstairs in the "staff only" basement of his apartment trying to turn up the heat on his water heater...

Jerry's internal voice is freaking out and watching as person after person clean up the work area for the instructor but each person just happens to miss removing the band aid. It gets pushed around a little bit and Jerry, knowing the dish is going to be processed soon, is afraid of the worst for this band aid.

Finally, Jerry decides to just make it through the processing part and then he knows he is safe. Then Kramer distracts him and the power goes out for a few moments (thanks to George playing the Super) and even though the instructor starts back up, Jerry is trying to straighten out Kramer for a moment in the post outage confusion. When Jerry finally gets his eyes back on the band aid, it is gone. He looks everywhere but can't find the band aid.

At first he keeps it in his head a little while longer, the food is coming out and looking delicious, he is trying to be nice and try everything but Jerry can't stand it anymore, stands up and shouts, "Where is the band aid?! Is it in here?! Here?!" He frantically scours the food, the food on other people's plates, the trash, but no sign of the band aid. Kramer, who has become infatuated with the instructor as well, goes to her aid and is kicking Jerry out of the class while he is yelling, "Where is it?! Where is it??!!!!" Knocking over tables, etc.

Kramer finds the band aid on the floor asks if this was what Jerry was freaking out about. But it was too late, Jerry was kicked out of the class.

Jerry is sitting outside the class to apologize to the beautiful woman. She walks out with Kramer and Kramer leaves to hail a cab. Jerry apologizes, saying how he just couldn't stop looking at it the whole time, yada, yada, yada... she says no problem, and shakes his hand. She gets in the cab, Kramer steps out to say something to Jerry to the effect of, "You know this was her first time back instructing since her surgery... You know she was wearing that band aid to cover up the final remains from her (insert rare skin disease here)."

Meanwhile, George is back in his apartment and feeling rather proud that he played a good Super and got his heat turned up. He brags about it to Elaine who is over watching his cable for this show she had to se

Response to The Lost Seinfeld Episode - The MIssing Band Aid.

  • Holly said on April 9, 2008 - 5:20 PM

    Wow Dana, you could totally be a writer for TV shows... no joke! I was captivated by it! Let's film it sometime... I think we should!

  • Kari said on April 9, 2008 - 6:16 PM

    I totally did not see the band-aid, but I did wonder why she only had a glove on one hand to start with. and I agree with Holly, you should think of doing script writing for tv...maybe you could be the fill-in during writer strikes so that it is a not a full time job and you could just do it now and again in your FREE TIME! :) maybe you could add in the random person walking thru to go to the bathroom. :)...wonder if they washed their hands before they shook hands with the cook! :P

  • Dana said on April 9, 2008 - 6:35 PM

    Thanks Ladies! Though Kari, your comment TOTALLY confirms my thought the whole time, that no one else saw the band aid but me, ;)!

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Begin Our Adventures of Fall/Winter 2012 to CA, MN, CO
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