Do not get me wrong, our suburb's home was great! Just look at this perfect photo! We loved the huge spaces and rooms in the house. We loved how clean the house was. We were definitely spoiled living in this home, beyond measure or necessity. 

On the flip side, the neighbors did not care that we were a nice family and were taking good care to respect them. They did not want anyone renting the house, they were annoyed. If we were talking on our back deck, they were annoyed. If the kids were playing in the pool, they were annoyed. If my son drove his RC car on the driveway, they were annoyed. They were quick to make certain I knew it, too, even if it meant the 65 year old woman approaching me in her incredibly short, silk, leopard print robe at 2 in the afternoon to tell me what for. We had sadly found ourselves in a lose/lose situation and no matter of love or Iowa-nice could help us. They had nothing but contempt for us. 

"Normal" school was going great! Just look at this perfect photo! We were being faithful at doing everything I had reported we would do. We were going through all our required subjects. We were taking amazing Saturday trips to zoos and aquariums. Not to mention, we found a great church in a surf town where we would spend our Sundays.

On the flip side, it didn't dawn on me until we were there that the nearest park was a half hour drive away - and that's without traffic. We couldn't walk to anywhere or anything. If we left home after school we never returned until way past bedtime due to the insane traffic both ways. It sadly became that I inadvertently confined us to the house grounds throughout the week.

In addition, even though I was getting better, I was still trying to figure out how to buy foods without dairy. Most of the food I bought was from Trader Joe's and everything says "May contain milk." It was definitely a hit or miss. This made school more difficult and overall life more difficult.

But isn't this pool great! Just look at this perfect photo! Seriously, the heated pool was the greatest gift of this entire house. It was simply wonderful. The kids played in it every day after school and could even practice their swimming strokes. We are talking October and November, swimming in an outdoor HEATED pool - amazing!

On the flip side, you would think with a heated pool at my disposal, I, too, would have attempted to learn to swim or get in the water even, but I didn't. (I am simply not a fan of being in water.) As I mentioned before with all our changes, I had kept myself active with fitness classes, running, and spin classses for most of the year and, except for driving time, I had been keeping the kids and I walking everywhere on our trip. But living here was a challenge for me physically. Josh was doing great, as he was able to bike to amazing places from this location. But for me, running from our location was such that you couldn't run on the roads safely due to the one lane/two way roads, no sidewalk, continual tight curves and hidden intersections/driveways, and a guarantee that you will get lost. It also didn't help that I was actually alone a lot and then it causes me to become even more recluse and lack a desire to leave the house. After a month, I would only get "exercise" on weekend adventures and that wasn't much. Thanks to some poor eating choices and a lack of real exercise, I gained more weight than I wish to admit. 

But on that flip side, as I've said before, being "alone" while living in California, with only my best friend to talk to, and now without the bustle of a city and a lot of quiet, it was incredibly freeing. I am not saying this is a healthy way to sustain life, but because I had this feeling like I had lived for so many years under the watchful eye of others, I now had no one to report to, no one to judge me, and knew that all my decisions, good or bad, were mine to own. I love living in community with people but because I had been so entrenched in something, to finally be alone and breathe... *sigh*... that was a relaxing moment.

But on that flip side, when we finally returned to home, I cried tears of joy. I embraced my friendships and community so much more. I was able to appreciate everything and everyone with new life and love. What an important gift community is and I valued it so much more now because of my alone time! 

But isn't that simply life? Many sides to every situation. These fancy facades, those perfect photos, the Facebook posts - they all have something behind them, sometimes it is perfect and sometimes it is ugly. I could share more of those stories, you could share those stories. But when I remember that, "God works all things for good for those who love God and are called according to His good purpose," I have hope. I may not always know the exact "good" things will turn into but I trust that it is there, somewhere, because I do know who I have hope in.

OH! I almost forgot! So remember my story about ending up at a first state park and how "the aura felt like melancholy and infinite sadness and I could not shake a sense of weirdness?" Later, retelling the story to Josh, we found out that the state park beach was actually next to a private beach that allows nudity. And that said nudity is known to spill out onto the state park beach, in addition to some nude, not-meant-for-primetime PDA. Not that I'm against nude beaches, it's just not something I was prepared to expose my children to at that moment and I was so thankful we had left when we did. Phew! :)!

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